No Whammy, No Whammy, No Whammy!

Does anyone else remember Press Your Luck?  This little guy?  (The image is probably trademarked and I'm totally using him under the Fair Use Doctrine, so there!)

The contestants would sit and wait for the perfect moment to depress their plungers to make the board stop moving its little light up rings around various amounts of money, but if it lands on THAT guy, they're outta luck.


That is how it has felt for the last week every time I stick a test strip into my glucometer. 

If you've been following along with this Voodoo Doll who has to prick herself 4x daily, you may recall that I had two spikes last week (one at breakfast and one at lunch) and a third NEAR-spike where I hit the upper limit (130) allowed after a burrito with some questionable sauce.  (Possibly too much sugar in Del Taco's sauce, says the Peanut Gallery.)   The rule is, if I get two spikes after the same meal time (or fasting time), then I am in trouble. 

The first few weeks of dealing with gestational diabetes, I was vigilant, but not really stressed about it.  I was reading my little journal from Global Dynamics/The Center/Evil Clinic and following the diet and exercise regimen, and getting good numbers in response.  But after those 2 (3?) spikes, I began to dread the glucometer. 

Because three strikes and I'm out.  (Well, technically it's 2 at the same time and I'm out, but I already am down in the count for breakfast and lunch, and the pitcher is looking at me like he wants to throw a curveball, or possibly bean me in the head.)

That's when I have to call the Center.  Will they put me on insulin?  I don't know.  I hope not.  I hope that if I can track the reason for the spike and avoid repeating the same behavior that caused the spike, I can stay off insulin.   But I don't know their policy, how many "spikes" they allow before they say, "That's it, Pinky, this isn't something you can control and so it's the syringe for you!"  And honestly?  I just don't want to have to find out.  I want to have good, low numbers every time, and I don't want to deal with the Center until my next regularly scheduled visit in a few weeks.

Which means avoiding the Whammy. 

So I've been cheating.  No, not really 'cheating' as in, not testing, testing late, fakin' my numbers.  I don't want to do anything that will harm The Niblet.   As it is, I was told I have a high level of amniotic fluid and that's GD related, they think.   With that comes risks of preterm labor, a detached placenta, and me bleeding out.  I'd like to avoid all of those, thanks. 

So I cheat in a different way.  Dinner says, "2-3 starch, 2 veggies, 2 protein, 2 fat."   But instead I have a salad with dressing (veggie and fat) and a shish kabob (2 protein, big hunks of steak, and another veggie--bell pepper and onion laced along the skewer.)    Notice what I didn't have?

And I've been doing it a lot.    1/2 slice of toast instead of 2 that I'm allowed.  Hawaiian style pork and green beans, no rice or macaroni salad at all.  (And eating Hawaiian food without rice or macaroni salad is nearly criminal, so don't tell anyone I did that.  They'll take away my Spam privileges.)

Because I am scared of the Whammy.  So my sugar levels have been pretty low.  Not too low, still in range, for sure.  But many times, not even over 100 after a meal.    Which isn't surprising if I ate only 1 of 2 allowed carbs, or skipped them entirely. 

But I just can't deal with the Whammy.  I don't like getting nervous and antsy as I watch the clock tick towards the one hour mark when I need to test. 

I get up to test and I feel (almost) as nervous as I did waiting for the computer screen to tell me whether I'd passed the Bar.  But I only had to do that ONCE.   I have to do this 4x a day.

I stick in the test strip, the glucometer beeps and the game's begun.  I grab my autolancet device and depress the plunger, loading the needle.  I pick a lucky finger.  I click the yellow button that jabs me ever so lightly, and I wait for the little red dot to appear on my finger.  I drop the autolancet and grab my finger with the opposite hand, and squeeze so the dot expands, growing from a dot to a splotch, and then take my finger and guide it to the end of the test strip.

The blood zips up the strip like it's being sucked up by a straw.  The glucometer beeps again and the screen flashes to an image of a little hourglass.  What is this, Pictionary?   I hold my breath as I wait, but still reach over to rip a handful of toilet paper off the stand so I can wrap up my bloody fingertip before I smear red all over the bathroom.   All the while thinking, "No Whammy.  No Whammy.  No Whammy."
Which makes every meal a time I have to decide to Press My Luck.  Will I skip the carbs entirely?  If I do, will I have enough energy to go upstairs?   Do I deviate at all from a known "safe meal," even though I am bored silly with eating the same few items and might possibly overdose on peanut butter and eggs?

This morning, I decided I would go for it. 

I followed some excellent advice (Thanks, Aubrey!) and traded in the evil Cream of Wheat for Steel Cut Irish Oats. (For the record, it isn't oatmeal and doesn't taste like oatmeal. It's way more fibrous and chunky than that.  But a sprinkle of cinnamon and Splenda and it was still quite good, but you will not confuse it for Quaker Instant, assuming you have a tongue.)

I also followed my Aunt Sue's suggestion and tried some diet juice --Ocean Spray Blue-Pom, 4 calories, 2 carbs in a cup, (I had 1/2 a cup), and a good dose of Vitamin C to take with my Iron supplement.  (Oh, yeah, because I have gestational diabetes, low iron, high white blood cell counts, and am Rh-negative.  Anything else I'm forgetting?)  I had originally been told to take the Iron with OJ but as soon as I was told I had GD there was no way I could have any OJ.  It's a spike in a glass.    Aunt Sue suggested the juice, and I didn't think I could have it, but when I read the label--Splenda sweetened (check!) and only 2 carbs in a cup?  I thought it was worth a shot, and a good way to get my extra C.  (Which apparently I need.  After several weeks on the iron, my last blood draw did not show any improvement in the low hemoglobin department.  Maybe this will help my body get the iron.  And I take the iron at breakfast because I am not supposed to mix it with milk, and I can't have milk at breakfast, so that works.) 

But despite the advice, I was still nervous.  Was any hot cereal going to be a problem?  Would even diet juice send me for a spike?  Was I being stupid for even trying these instead of just sticking with my morning eggs and 1/2 an english muffin?  Was I wrong for lusting after juice?

I pressed my luck. 

And there was no whammy. 

Take that, gestational diabetes!